It’s time to set the record straight. I hear a lot of talk… maybe too much talk…

Some of you are under a delusional state of thinking when it comes to Burritos. Some of you think that Chipotle is God’s gift to tex-mex, while Freebird’s is the red-headed stepchild.

YOU ARE WRONG!

Oh how you are so, so wrong! Freebirds has existed for many decades, and long ago became a legend of the Texas A&M dynasty. In times of old, the brave mexican-food fanatic would have to travel for miles, into the deep dark parts of Texas, to find the golden Super Monster burrito from the only existing Freebird’s, when the existence of Quesadillas was a closely held secret known only to the Burrito Illuminati… selah…

And then it was all ruined by some punk who ripped it off and started making junky places called “Chipotle,” which I don’t think is even a word. The once noble and honorable Freebird’s had no choice but to spread burrito love to all parts of the globe through an ever-increasing franchise.

Now, don’t get me wrong – Chipotle makes a good burrito. I like it. But IT is the rip off. Freebirds is the original, the burrito-mother, the holy foil-wrapped pouch of goodness. Chipotle is nothing but a good-looking imposter, who has managed to fool countless would-be fans of Tex-Mex delicacies. It’s kindof like Leonardo DeCaprio in “The Man in the Iron Mask.” Except with chicken, and refried beans.

So please, please, get your stories straight. And let us all enjoy the burritos of glory  under the banner of truth, justice, and queso (it costs a little extra).

Also – the phrase “spread burrito love”? Grossest thing I’ve ever said. Mark it.

Bonus Question: Who am I quoting in the first line of this post?

This entry was posted on Wednesday, March 26th, 2008 at 12:01 am and is filed under News. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.