I have to admit, Arkansas is one of those places that I just can’t stand. I know it’s beautiful, the Ozarks, the trees, the air, whatever, but despite all that, I nurse a severe grudge against Arkansas. Part of it is because we used to travel up there a couple of times a year as a kid. Most of my extended family lived there, so we made a lot of trips up there, and lets be honest, if you’re not hiking, there’s not a whole lot going on in Arkansas. And when I was a kid, I was even more of a nerd than I am now, which means I kindof hated the outdoors, so the idea of “The Natural State” was not something that excited me.

A lot of those trips were boring or awkward, but even with some of the trips being awesome, it just got to be too much of the same thing after a while. By the time I was in High School, I was sick of Arkansas, and it was made much worse when a girlfriend of mine decided to go to college there, so now I associate the whole state with our failed relationship and all the memories that went along with it…

So, I guess it’s not Arkansas’ fault that I hate it, it’s kindof a victim of circumstance. I certainly have no valid, logical reasons to hold such a grudge against the entire state. But Sandy and Ray are on their way to Memphis from Texas, which means they go right through Arkansas. If there was ever a place to stage some crazy misadventures, that’s the place. So please, if I have any Arkansas readers, please don’t be offended. I’m just trying to turn something that has brought me pain into something that can bring me laughter.